England fans were so unimpressed by the drab win over Andorra that only two people bothered to write in about it — more were interested in defending Manchester United captain Bruno Fernandes.
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Andorra 0 England 1 and Gareth Southgate
Andorra 0 England 1. Well a win is a win but by God that was awful to watch.
People complained that Gareth Southgate didn’t play attacking football but we did score hatfuls of goals against the likes of Andorra.
Today under Thomas Tuchel we struggled to score 1 goal against Andorra and never looked like getting any more. So where’s this attacking football under Tuchel that we were promised?
Dan, London
Gash England
Good job we had Jordan Henderson on the field to bring us all that leadership experience. And I suppose at least we found out that lad Harry Kane can score goals. I loved Tommy T’s touchline and post match “WTF lads?”, but if you’re gonna pick the geriatric money grubbing water carrier, and start Kane in games like this, then my patience has already run out. It’s all academic anyway though, since France and/or Spain will absolutely ruin us even if every player manages to miraculously give a 10/10 performance for every game of a tournament.
Oh, and can someone tell Bellingham to wind his fecking neck in and shut his gob too please? We know you’re at Madrid Jude, but it doesn’t mean you’re supposed to spend the entire game giving the ref grief instead of beating An-f**king-dorra.
AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TRY TAKING YOUR MAN ON LADS. They looked like Arsenal fannying about in Arteta’s devastating ‘horseshoe of impotence’ formation, cunningly keeping possession on the perimeter of their box.
RHT/TS
Why the Bruno Hate?
I get that fans of other clubs don’t like Bruno. You didn’t like Beckham, Rooney, Ronaldo, or Keane either. It’s not a popularity contest. You’re welcome to think of him as ugly, whiny, or a weakling – fair play to you and the rest of the PFM gang. Maybe you’ve confused football with Vogue or Men’s Health Magazine.
But to Derrick who wrote in to say ‘No united striker will score with Bruno in the team, he is supposed to be the creator but it’s something he simply can’t do…’ – would this be the same Bruno who last year was the 3rd highest chance creator in the top 5 leagues (and the #1 in the Premier League) according to Planet Football, and the #1 chance creator in the Premier League in the last 5 years?
Don’t let the fog of hate block the pathways of understanding, my friend.
Ved Sen MUFC
Maybe it’s the ugly thing
There seems a high correlation between pithy Bruno-bashing emails and the ability to write articulate, coherent sentences. Not sure what one can infer from that.
There are many reasons to think that Bruno leaving for a huge fee makes sense for United, particularly given the financial constraints. I was firmly in the camp that given his age and the lack of clear role in the system that it probably was the right time. But he stays, that’s fine too.
What I’ll not have is this irrational bashing of a player based on perception rather than reality. The reality is, over the last 5 seasons he is not just the outright greatest chance creator in all of Europe (source: statmuse) he leads second place by almost 30% more chances. He is 13th in goals + assists and is the only non striker/winger in the top 25. No one in Europe is more productive than Bruno at creating chances.
Even in a season without a striker worthy of the title in a fully dysfunctional United team when compared to midfielders he is in the 97-99th percentile in Shots, Assists, Exp Goals, Exp Assists and Shot Creating Actions. 98th in progressive passses. His defensive actions are far more in line with a decent central midfielder than one tasked with creating. He runs more than almost anyone else. He has more tackles and blocks than plenty of defensive midfielders.
He is terrible at running with the ball, can’t fend off strong challenges when he receives it in dangerous positions and is probably the last person who should be receiving a pass in traffic but he does a whole lot of football a whole lot better than just about every other player in the world.
Bottom line: if you think Bruno is your problem, then you should probably think about other things.
Ryan, Bermuda
More on Bruno…
Jamo, I can sort of see what you mean about Bruno not being liked because he’s not “handsome”, but you lost all credibility when you used Cole Palmer as a counter example! I mean Cole Palmer?? God bless him, he’s very good at football, but he’s a British version of Cletus from Simpsons!
Personally I’ll never forgive Fernandes for winning a penalty by standing on Konsa’s ankle, nothing to do with his admittedly rat-like face.
Oli, AVFC
On Ange…
The contrast between ManU’s mistaken retention of Erik Ten Hag and Spurs’ sacking of Ange Postecoglou is obvious, but I don’t think it’s apt.
Manchester United is used to winning cups (indeed, they’d won the Carabao and FA Cups in the seasons before his sacking). Spurs, on the other hand, hadn’t won anything is almost two decades; that Europa League win was far, far more impactful than United’s FA Cup and a far better justification for retaining Big Ange. In short, ManU made the wrong call after the FA Cup, but it doesn’t follow that Spurs made the right one.
I’m not positive that Spurs have made a mistake. That will depend on the replacement they secure and the reactions along the squad, some of which seem negative indeed. But it sure would have been interesting to watch Ange and Spurs next season. I’ll miss that weirdo.
Also, I’m still troubled by the quiet transfer front at NUFC. I’d expected us to have at least Mbeumo wrapped up by now. And while the club is no doubt wise to protect its wage structure, he would’ve been prefect for us. 18 year-old Antonio Cordero looks promising, but isn’t yet a first-team contributor, and that transfer has probably been quietly agreed weeks or months ago. It’s already starting to feel like last summer.
Chris C, Toon Army DC
That settles that…
Turns out Levy also thought Spurs season was less successful than Arsenal’s. Thanks for moving so swiftly to shut up that nonsense Danny boy!
Trophies are great, but we need to stop trying to pretend that winning ones that Arsenal have played too well over consecutive seasons to compete for should be seen as a greater level of success! A few lucky games to win a trophy don’t mask a season of underperforming – it’s like nobody learnt anything from Man Utd and Ten Hag.
James (Gooner exiled in the North East)
Spurs can’t win, except they did
As soon as spurs won the Europa I realised this was a dream for football editors and rival fans.
Keep Ange and we’re a banter club, accepting mediocrity and a manager out of his depth because we beat a bunch of pub teams to win a second tier trophy. Sack Ange, and we’re a banter club who wins a major trophy and immediately sacks the manager. Perfect.
But here’s the thing – I don’t care. We did win a major trophy, we are in the champions league, we do have a young squad that can compete with some sensible additions and a more tactically astute manager, and we avoided the ETH trap of keeping the wrong guy for (understandable) emotional reasons. Sonny came out and said that Ange ‘changed the trajectory of the club’ and by winning something that may well be true, and he’ll always be remembered fondly but this really is the best of both worlds.
Now of course Daniel Levy is fully capable of clutching defeat from the jaws of victory by signing a another bunch of 18 year olds, but if we buy a proper 6 and at least one top notch forward plus a couple of depth pieces this really is an attractive squad to work with over the next few years. If I was Frank or Poch I’d jump at the chance.
Phil, London
…Ange was a good coach for Tottenham who sacrificed the league for a cup win(you know deep down arsenal fans wish arteta could do this). Tottenham did not lose those games because they were inferior to their opponents,you could see they gave up on the league and were focusing on their cup performance. There was little interest in playing in the league.
It was probably painful for their fans to experience such defeats in the league but most fans would prefer an actual cup rather than a perennial 2nd place finish whose only reward is the repugnant feeling of what would have been if things were different.
Even though there were legitimate reasons for Tottenham’s actions, they have lost a good coach and they will only realize this when they appoint their next coach who doesn’t win them trophies (of any kind).
Jamo
A-Team
Manuel Almunia
Trentsfer AA – Toby Alderweireld Azpilicueta – Marcos Alonso
Arshavin – Xabi Alonso Marcos Asencio
Julian Alvarez – Arguero – Nic Anelka –
Pretty tasty team, albeit brazil in nature lol (more attack than defence)
Gab YNWA (PS my toenails grew another 2 mm, which is more progress than can be said for lfc’s transfer dealings)
An M-XI that makes you go mmm…
Mamardashvili
Maicon, Marquinhos, Murillo, Maldini
Modric, Mac Allister, Matthaus
Maradona, Messi, Mbapp
Jo (I’d have had Gabriel Magalhaes but there are too many pedants here) Kent
Z-Team
Here’s my Z team, I’m playing 442 but with a controversial ‘one half per keeper’ approach. (Just cause I couldn’t leave one of them out.)
GK: Zoff/ Zubizaretta.
DEF: Zanetti, Ze Roberto, Ze Maria, Zambrotta.
MID: Zico, Zubimendi, Zinedine Zidane.
FWD: Zaha, Zola.
Hartley MCFC Somerset
V-Team
If I can get away with another. The V team.
Van der Sar,
Van Bronkhorst/ Van Dyjk/ Vidic/ Van der Ven.
Viera/ Valderrama/ Vidal (Ernesto).
Van Basten/ Van Nistelrooy/ Vardy.
Hartley MCFC Somerset
The only real asterisk in football
Totally agree with Badwolfs comments on Saturday.
The only real asterisk in football is after the phrase “zero tolerance of discrimination”.
Football quite gladly welcomes gender inequality, homophobia, racism, transphobia and others. Statistically every starting 11 should have 1 gay player. Maybe it does, but no one feels safe enough to admit it.
You don’t want to support British values, you can take a suspension. It should be a condition of professional registration.
Alex, South London