It’s been a sad summer with regards to my all-time favorite Tottenham Hotspur players. First Son Heung-Min left the club to finish his career with LAFC in MLS, and now this — according to journalist Cesar Luis Merlo, former Tottenham attacking midfielder Erik Lamela has terminated his contract with AEK Athens and retired. He now plans to join the coaching staff at Sevilla.
If you don’t like Erik Lamela, you have no soul (or you joined the fandom too late). Now 33, it’s clear Erik was nearing the end of his playing days, but it’s still sad to see of your favorites hang up his boots. That said, this feels like a real missed opportunity for Tottenham and Thomas Frank. Surely Spurs could use Dark Arts and Shithousery Coach, right? Lamela practically has a PhD in the subjects and I hate the idea of him imparting his skills onto the next generation of Sevilla footballers and not that of his beloved Spurs. There’s a whole generation of young Tottenham academy players who could absolutely benefit from learning how to steal water bottles from opposition physios, the best way to step on Cesc Fabregas’ hand while pretending it was accidental, the art of slide-tackling opponents inside your own box, rabona goal instruction, and calling Jack Wilshere a p***y.
Football is that much poorer without him on the pitch, but at least he’s still in the game. And who knows, maybe someday we’ll see Tottenham Hotspur Head Coach Erik Lamela someday. Wouldn’t THAT be something? Go on, king.