Cartilage Free Captain

This isn’t really news about Tottenham Hotspur, so as we wait for Spurs’ Europa League semifinal match against Bodø/Glimt we’re expanding out into the greater Tottenham Hotspur Cinematic Universe. Former Spurs utility midfielder/defender Eric Dier’s contract at Bayern Munich runs out this summer, and according to multiple reports including The Athletic, Dier will be joining Ligue 1 Monaco on a free transfer.

Dier followed Harry Kane from Tottenham to Bayern, initially on loan which then became a permanent contract. It seemed like a weird move at the time — Dier seemingly couldn’t get a game at Spurs near the end of his tenure so he moves to... arguably one of the best clubs in world football? But Dier earned himself a lot of fans in Germany by being who he is — a solid teammate, a decent defender, and a team player. Bayern apparently offered Dier a one year contract extension

Our friends at Bavarian Football Works break down Dier’s impact on the presumptive German champions over the past two years — they seem to love him as much as we did when he was anchoring Spurs’ midfield under Mauricio Pochettino.

Dier’s had an extremely interesting football career. An Englishman by birth, he grew up in Portugal and came through Sporting’s academy before signing with Tottenham as a 20 year old utility player, making his debut at right back and scoring the winning goal against West Ham. He’s now played in Portugal, England and Germany, and at age 31 gets to see out his career in Monte Carlo by the French Riviera. Not too shabby if you ask me.

With the ongoing trophy drought, any semifinal appearance is going to feel enormous for Tottenham Hotspur, but it is hard to see any scenario outweighing this season’s Europa League campaign. Ange Postecoglou put a target on his back with his second-season trophy comments last summer and has done nothing but throw gas on the fire with his club’s horrifying Premier League performance.

Despite all that, Postecoglou still has a chance to make do on his claim — in fact, oddsmakers see Spurs as the most likely to raise the trophy. Much of that is due to a substantially beneficial semifinal draw against Bodo/Glimt, who arrives in North London as massive underdogs. Spurs can ill afford to waste this opportunity; Thursday must end with a lopsided score line heading back to Norway.

Semifinals (1st Leg): Tottenham Hotspur (0) vs. Bodo/Glimt (0)

Date: Thursday, May 1

Time: 3:00 pm ET, 8:00 pm UK

Location: Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, London

TV: Paramount+ (USA), TNT Sports 2 (UK)

Glimt finished ninth in the League Phase table, level on points with eighth-place Rangers, and started the knockout rounds with wins over Twente and Olympiacos. After taking a 2-0 lead over Lazio in the quarterfinals, the Italian side came back to force penalties in Rome, though the underdogs escaped in dramatic fashion.

The Norwegians clearly have the ability to take down bigger clubs, but this tie heavily favors Tottenham. These sides have never met in competitive play, which is no surprise given Glimt’s limited European history. Spurs last faced a team from Norway in the 2013-14 Europa League, winning both fixtures against Tromso in the Group Stage.

Interior pressure

With the first leg at home — and the second leg on a strange pitch near the Arctic — of course Tottenham will feel obligated to jump in front and bring a lead on the road. However, that necessity is even more significant with multiple key absences for the visitors. Starting midfielders Patrick Berg and Hakon Evjen are out due to suspension, as is forward Andreas Helmersen. The gap in quality between these starting XIs is significant with full availability, but now the chasm grows even wider.

Spurs were always likely to own much of the ball, but the visitors’ midfield absentees mean that possession absolutely must translate into opportunities. At least two of Lucas Bergvall, James Maddison, and Dejan Kulusevski will be tasked with orchestrating the attack and leading a 90-minute onslaught on the Glimt net. Even without Heung-Min Son, Tottenham really should be expected to dominate this one and log multiple goals. Lazio, Olympiacos, and Twente all found success away from Bodo, and the situation is set up perfectly for Spurs to do the same.

External pressure

Should Tottenham fail to capitalize against an overmatched, undermanned side, then the next seven days will get dicey. Glimt carries a significant homefield advantage and will relish a chance to dictate terms, especially with the majority of its starting midfield returning in the second leg. Playing first in North London could let Spurs to effectively put the tie away, but leaving the door open becomes even more dangerous knowing how different next week could look.

The cries will be even louder for Postecoglou if his side comes out flat, especially if defensive miscues once again lead to disaster going the other way. I am willing to give him the benefit of the doubt after two professional performances against Eintracht Frankfurt, but taking care of the gimmes has been a challenge all year, both domestically and in Europe. This team is desperate to take something from this season and has gotten the plumpest gift one could imagine. Win by multiple goals Thursday, or prepare for chaos.

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Tottenham Hotspur Daily Links: The Hoddle Of Coffee

The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News and Links for Wednesday, April 30

A look at the month ahead

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We’re barreling towards the final day of the EFL Championship with a lot up in the air. After 45 matchdays, very little has been decided. What we do know is that Burnley and Leeds are going straight back up, and Cardiff City and Argyle are going down.

This is one of the weaker seasons of the Championship that I can remember, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t worth watching. So let’s get straight to where things stand heading into MW46.

CLINCHED PROMOTION: Leeds United, Burnley

It was a dominant season by these two clubs, highlighting the gulf between Premier League money and Championship money.

CLINCHED PLAYOFFS

Sheffield United: A distant third to Leeds and Burnley. It’s clear the three PL-relegated clubs are miles above the rest here. United should coast to promotion via playoffs, but who knows.

Sunderland: Four consecutive losses, the most recent being a 0-2 loss against Oxford United. They’ve looked awful in recent months.

HUNT FOR PLAYOFFS

Bristol City (67 Pts): No idea how they got to fifth - by every other club being worse? Their 0-4 loss to Leeds tore apart their GD. A big weekend at Preston NE awaits.

Coventry (66 Pts): Frank Lampard turned this club around, but a loss against Luton came at a bad time. Haji Wright and Ellis Simms are both prominent goalscorers. They have an all-or-nothing game against Boro.

Millwall (66 Pts): Coming into Saturday with the best form, so why not give them a shout at the playoffs? Well, I’ll give you a reason: They play Burnley next.

Blackburn Rovers (65 Pts): It’s always a matter of time when Rovers collapse. It happened during the winter, which gave this squad enough time to maybe turn their season around with four wins on the bounce. They travel to Sheffield United next.

Boro (64 Pts): Calculus is simple here. They need a win against Coventry and both Millwall and Rovers to drop points.

GOING NOWHERE: West Brom, Swansea, Sheffield Wednesday, Watford, QPR, Portsmouth, Oxford United

West Brom might be the only one upset to be lumped into this group. For others like Portsmouth and Oxford United, it marks a big moments. Nice to see Wednesday and QPR not fighting for survival.

RACE FOR SURVIVAL

Stoke City (50 Pts) and Derby County (49): Two relegation candidates are playing against each other on Saturday. A point does it for Stoke City while Derby need all three to clinch, but maybe a point is enough also.

Preston (49): They’ve been awful since the turn of the year and now find themselves on the doorstep of League One. Just 10 wins on the season with 19 draws - that’s a lot of dropped points.

Luton Town (49): Is the great escape on? Luton are threatened with double-relegation, but had a huge win last week against Millwall. They travel to a hapless WBA on Saturday.

Hull City (48): Hull City currently sit in the relegation zone a year after they sacked Liam Rosenior. I’m not surprised to see them here, obviously.

RELEGATED

Plymouth Artgle (46): Okay, so technically not officially confirmed. But they’ve got a -36 GD. No way they’re making it up. A shame.

Cardiff City (44): A spectacularly horrible season closes in predictable fashion, with their owner making some strange statements in recent days.

Fitzie’s track of the day: Alice’s Restaurant Masacree, by Arlo Guthrie

And now for your links:

Football London: “Bodo/Glimt major error that changed dressing room atmosphere ahead of Tottenham Europa League tie”

The Telegraph: “West Brom to make move for Marti Cifuentes after QPR place him on gardening leave”

BBC: “Bristol Rovers and Crawley relegated from League One”

It’s been a rough few days, so how about some good news? Tottenham Hotspur announced just moments ago that Swedish teenage midfielder Lucas Bergvall has signed a new and improved contract with the club through the 2031 season!

If there’s a bright side to the massive injury crisis that completely derailed Tottenham’s season, it’s this — Lucas Bergvall has become a much, much better footballer at a much faster pace than expected. Bergvall joined the club last summer after being convinced by Ange Postecoglou to come to North London instead of Barcelona. It was considered a coup at the time, and it feels like even more of one now.

Bergvall took some time to find his feet in the Premier League, but he’s settled and become one of Tottenham’s best midfielders in his first season at the club, and he just turned 19. Signing a new six year contract is not only rewarding his growth (and giving him a presumably healthy pay raise) but also suggests that despite all the turmoil and poor results this season he still really believes in the Tottenham project and wants to be a part of it.

In fact, it makes me wonder whether the Spurs players have not hated this season’s experience nearly to the level that the fans have. All season long players like Bergvall, Son Heung-Min, Dejan Kulusevski, and others have defended Ange Postecoglou and repeatedly said they’re still behind the manager and the project. This is another data point in that set.

This is fantastic news. Bergvall is a young star-in-waiting that you can absolutely build a team around, and it sure looks like Tottenham are going to try.

Congratulations, Lucas! Now go win us a European trophy!

Tottenham Hotspur’s Europa League semifinal opponent, Norwegian side Bodø/Glimt, are in a world of hurt heading into Thursday’s match at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. I wrote last week that Bodø/Glimt will be without three players due to suspension, including club captain Patrick Berg and starting midfielder Hakon Evjen.

Add injuries to the list. Reports out of Norway say Bodø/Glimt could be missing two additional important players — winger Ole Blomberg missed their last match with an injury he sustained recently and is a doubt for Thursday, and central defender Odin Bjørtuft (which might be the coolest and most Norwegian name I’ve ever heard for a CB) left their last match with what appeared to be a groin injury. Bjortuft in particular has been one of the rocks in Bodø/Glimt’s back line, and his absence will be keenly felt.

As a rule we do not celebrate when players from opposition teams get injured. That’s both rude and also a pretty toxic thing to do, no matter who you root for. And honestly, what Bodø/Glimt are going through sounds pretty familiar after watching Spurs on the struggle bus for most of 2025 due to injury concerns of their own.

However, it’s undeniable that this situation helps Tottenham a great deal going into Thursday. Spurs’ biggest potential miss will be Son Heung-Min, who is working to recover from a foot injury, and it’s an open question as to whether he’ll be fit in time to play. But Spurs are pretty healthy otherwise, and should be able to put out a very strong team at home against the Fightin’ Norwegians (no, this is not their nickname but we’re going to say it is).

It goes without saying that this is a massive opportunity for Tottenham. While they technically don’t have to win (see their comeback win over Frankfurt after drawing the home tie), they won’t get a better opportunity to run up the score on their opponents to the extent that it’s possible. Bodø/Glimt are 6-1 at home in the Europa League with wins over Porto, Besiktas, Olimpiacos, and Lazio, and their only loss coming, inexplicably, to Qarabag in the group stage. They are not a club to overlook in Norway, and taking a substantial win north of the Wall would be advisable.

He had to get into the backdoor, but Warren Zevon is going into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

The Rock Hall of Fame this week announced its newest class. Among them is Warren Zevon, who gets in not through the “performer category” but via the “musical excellence” category. It’s one artists get when they can’t win the former.

Easy to be slighted, but I won’t be. So long as Zevon is in the Hall, that’s what matters.

Or does it? Because the RRHOF is silly, after all, and certainly no indicator of an artist’s legacy. That rests in the musicians who came after them, their impact on culture and the thousands (or millions) of people who loved their music.

Here are the other inductees: Bad Company, Chubby Checker, Joe Cocker, Cyndi Lauper, Outkast, Soundgarden, White Stripes. And in the side categories: Salt-N-Pepa, Thom Bell, Nicky Hopkins, Carol Kaye, Lenny Waronker

Some of the more surprising lists here are Chubby Checker (why??), Soundgarden (a happy surprsie) and Salt-N-Pepa (in the musical excellence category?).

But best of all is the inclusion of Warren Zevon, a brilliant songwriter finally getting the credit he deserves.

Fitzie’s track of the day: Excitable Boy, by Warren Zevon

And now for your links:

The Athletic ($$): “Tottenham have sacrificed league pride for Europa League hope – they should be honest about it”

Alasdair Gold: “The Premier League must act on Tottenham’s Aston Villa fixture to prevent Man Utd fiasco”

Dan KP: “Tottenham standards hit new low as Ange Postecoglou’s cultural reset flounders”

Buckle up, y’all — the rumors surrounding the future of Cristian Romero is about to become a SAGA. There’s been tons of smoke, most of it in the unreliable corners of the Spanish football media, that Cuti has been making doe-eyes at clubs in La Liga ahead of a potential summer transfer away from Tottenham Hotspur.

The club that is most closely linked to Romero is Atletico Madrid, and Cuti hasn’t exactly done a lot of work to distance himself from the idea of leaving Spurs. Cuti gave an interview last week and responded to a leading question that said he’d be open to playing in Spain, since that’s the major European league in which he hasn’t played in his career (with Romero notably omitting Ligue 1, whoops).

The latest transfer rumor came in over the weekend with Matteo Moretto writing in Relevo that not only is Atleti interested in Romero, Cuti has already said yes to the idea of playing for Diego Simeone next season. The report suggests that Romero is focused on Tottenham and the Europa League, but will see what happens with contract negotiations and the like at the end of the season.

Now “already said yes” to the idea of playing for Atleti is doing a lot of heavy lifting. Most likely this is Cuti’s agent keeping options open, which is what good agents do — how many times have we seen players agreeing personal terms with clubs only to have deals fall apart over transfer fees? And let’s not pretend that Daniel Levy isn’t going to drive a hard bargain. If we know anything about Levy it’s this — he has a player valuation in mind and will not budge from it. I saw a spurious report (which I won’t link to) that suggested Atleti were hoping to nab Cuti for €35m and [derisive laughter].

All that said, there’s a ton of smoke in the air about Cuti’s future. And I get it — if I’m considered one of the best central defenders in the league and have won a World Cup I’m not sure I’d want to stick around on a team that’s currently 16th in the table either. Cuti’s future might also hinge on whether or not Spurs win the Europa League and qualify for Champions League football next season, and come to think of it that’s probably why he’s so focused on the end of the season at Spurs.

So gird your loins, everyone — no matter what Spurs do against Bodø/Glimt over the next two weeks, these rumors aren’t going away. Might as well get used to the idea.

In case you hadn’t heard, Tottenham Hotspur’s season is still alive! Well, in Europe at least, and so all the eggs have gone into that basket. Unfortunately, Spurs do still have to contend with Premier League fixtures, albeit pointless ones, which means management of player fitness and conditioning in a manner as to prioritize the club’s European commitments.

With that in mind, Spurs are trying all avenues to fashion success in the Europa League, and as such requested movement of their May 18th fixture away at Aston Villa ahead of a hypothetical Europa League final - this according to Sami Mokbel of the BBC. Villa’s response?

Nah, we’re good, thanks.

Villa have reportedly rejected Spurs’ request. The final is currently scheduled for May 21st, three days after Spurs’ match in Birmingham (not London, guys), with the Villa fixture a week after the Lilywhites’ match against Crystal Palace and a whopping eight days after the Villains head to Bournemouth. The Spurs brass apparently asked for the match to be played on the 15th, which... sure, maybe there could have been some compromise somewhere between the 15th and 18th; but the proposed date is still four days after Villa take on the Cherries.

Mokbel is reporting Villa’s reasoning stems from them playing every 3-4 days through April (which, sure) and the fact that being their last home match of the season they have organized a number of fan-focused activities which couldn’t be easily rescheduled. There’s also the fact that Aston Villa are still in a battle for European (and Champions League) spots; but isn’t it more fun to imagine they are just being super messy and petty?

The infuriating thing is it actually helps clubs in Villa’s position for Spurs to do well in Europe. Trophies mean a decent weighting towards the FA’s European coefficient, resulting in more potential Champions League places for which Premier League sides could qualify - a bonus for a side like Villa who are at times on the cusp of those spots.

It may not matter, as Spurs still have to get past Bodø/Glimt, not a fait accompli, but I imagine the thinking was it was better to ask sooner or later. Regardless, the outcome has been a negative one: Aston Villa have rebuffed Spurs’ ask, and it remains to be seen if there is room for negotiation.

For the first time in history, we have seen a triple promotion.

Wrexham are now in the EFL Championship. Their promotion follows a late-season wobble from Wycome Wanderers, including a 0-1 loss to Leyton Orient (hellow Tottenham friends).

Now Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney are one stet closer to their dream of taking the Welsh club to the Premier League. Who knows how long that next step will take. There is s huge, huge gap between League One and the Premier League.

For as bad as Leicester have been this season, it’s hard to believe they’d struggle against a Leage One side.

I know it’s easy to hate on Wrexham right now, given the Hollywoodness of their story.

But I’d like to say, for the record, I didn’t like Wrexham first. That’s because of a Football Manager experience I had with them years ago. Long before Rob and Ryan entered the fold, I took Wrexham out of the National League with a poor squad.

I wanted to refresh the squad. I wanted to buy their football ground, to build it and to create a more sustainable football club. But I was rebuffed at every offer. And so, after much complaining, I was sacked.

But I can’t hold that against this current Wrexham. And next season’s Championship is going ot be very interesting, indeed.

Fitzie’s track of the day: the last great american dynasty, by Taylor Swift

And now for your links:

The Athletic ($$): “Liverpool 5 Tottenham 1 – Spurs hit new low in record-equalling defeat”

BBC: “Villa object to Spurs request for fixture change”

Dan KP: “Ange Postecoglou decisions leave Tottenham with an unwanted question to answer before Europa League showdown”

Telegraph: “‘We always felt if Spurs crossed the Watford Gap they would wet themselves!’”

What I take from this match is that 16th place Tottenham Hotspur’s highly rotated B-side is not as good as a full strength Liverpool playing for a Premier League title at home. And yeah, that’s pretty much all I’m taking from this match.

It’s time to rate the players.

Rate the players from 1⁄2 to 5 stars. If the player doesn’t deserve a rating due to minutes played, DO NOT RANK. I will round the stars up/down to the nearest half-star for the player ratings later this week.