One Spurs star decided to ‘berate’ Igor Tudor while another ‘broke’ their ‘silence’, sadly not on his decision to become a fourth official.
We also have an ‘ex-Tottenham star’ hosting his own half-time walk out in tribute to the future Championship club.
While Kylian Mbappe is treading a dangerous, Raheem Sterling-adjacent path which should have us all worried.
Sol searching
The imminent relegation of Spurs is great fun and it is easy to get carried away as a result but there is no excuse for this sort of nonsense from the Daily Express website:
‘Dominic Solanke breaks Tottenham dressing room silence after Crystal Palace embarrassment’
The ‘silence’ lasted less than an hour, and was ‘broken’ at the first available opportunity in a post-match interview with Solanke still in his full kit. Bore off.
Porro form
But that is nothing compared to this doozy from talkSPORT:
‘Pedro Porro appears to berate Igor Tudor as he smacks bench in furious rage’
It is a headline somehow both unequivocal and vague. The ‘appears to’ is pure tabloidese, a crutch allowing them to heavily imply rather than outright state something happened and thus avoid any nasty consequences down the line.
Yet there still needs to be an element of truth to the story, a suggestion that Pedro Porro did indeed ‘berate’ his manager. You can’t just say ‘Mikel Arteta appeared to curl one out in the middle of the Etihad pitch’ without some evidence.
And how quaint that it is a caption to the first picture which undermines the entire construct of the article:
‘Porro appeared to berate the fourth official after he was taken off in Spurs’ latest loss’
Mediawatch would not put it past Spurs for their failing interim coach to transform into a lambasted fourth official during a game in a showcase of peak Spursiness, but it already appears as though Porro did not appear to berate Tudor at all.
How unfortunate that it takes until the ninth paragraph for the truth to be revealed:
‘As Porro left the field, though, he turned back in his manager’s direction to berate the fourth official.
‘He could be seen shouting back at Ruebyn Ricardo as the official pointed towards the bench in an attempt to calm the Spanish defender down.’
So that headline is just an outright lie? The story was published at 10.23pm on Thursday evening and updated at 8.12 the following morning, but the claim that ‘Pedro Porro appears to berate Igor Tudor’ is still there by Friday lunchtime and presumably continues to rake in the clicks.
O my word
Without wanting to look beyond the absolute surface level of Jamie O’Hara ‘storming out’ live on talkSPORT (just before an ad break) at being teased by Jason Cundy in an Ange Postecoglou mask, this is quite clearly a step too far in the description of the incident from The Sun website:
”Pointless doing a show with you’ – Ex-Tottenham star walks out of talkSPORT slot after old side’s defeat to Palace’
‘Ex-Tottenham star’? With 34 Premier League appearances for them in six years? Fewer than Mathys Tel, Jake Livermore and Ryan Sessegnon? Absolutely not.
Awful impediment
The instinct is to think that Martin Lipton might have been stitched up with this Sun headline:
‘Scholes, Neville and Keane have formed a punditry hit squad on Michael Carrick – they could stop him getting Man Utd job’
But there, eight paragraphs deep, is this incriminating line:
‘Indeed, even some die-hard United fans are now asking if the biggest impediment to Carrick’s chances of taking the helm full-time is the opinions of the influential old boys.’
It feels like losing to a Newcastle side reduced to ten men for an entire half and previously on a run of one win in seven Premier League games might actually be ‘the biggest impediment’ to Carrick getting the permanent job, even if Paul Scholes does insist on being weird.
In for the Kyl
The media has, for some time now, collectively struggled to decide what a footballer should do with their money.
The days of Raheem Sterling being criticised for spending too much on a house, too little on flights and never precisely the right amount on everything in between have thankfully passed. But the quest goes on to find out what the tabloid media deems acceptable.
And how unfortunate that said quest continues to revolve specifically around how successful young black men spend their money.
‘Kylian Mbappe spotted driving modest £35,000 car despite earning staggering £12.8MILLION-a-year salary’ – MailOnline.
‘Kylian Mbappe spotted driving modest vehicle after passing driving test at 27, despite having stunning supercar fleet’ – The Sun.
‘Spotted’! As if he should somehow be ashamed in some way! And you can almost taste the impotent fury on both the occasions ‘despite’ is used there.
Please, Kylian, do not buy your mum a house any time soon. Yes, we know you earn a staggering £12.8m-a-year salary, but still.
Best show of perspective of the day
‘Marseille fans left fuming by what Mason Greenwood did during embarrassing defeat’ – The Sun website.
Standing away from the team during a penalty shoot-out is definitely the worst thing Mason Greenwood has ever done. Good to see those fuming Marseille fans have their priorities right.