Big Issue

One in four people experience suicidal thoughts in the UK and Ireland, and someone takes their life every 90 minutes, according to official statistics analysed by Samaritans.

Hazard knows now that people who are suffering with their mental health can “disguise their feelings”.

“To this day, I am still as shocked as the first moment it happened,” says Hazard. “It was like no feeling I have ever known. I received a phone call from my sister’s next-door neighbour. My next-door neighbours came running into my house thinking I’d had a heart attack, because I was so in shock. I was in complete and total shock.

“It didn’t register what had happened. My next-door neighbour was by my side. And that was the longest half-hour drive I have had in my life to inform them what had happened and get down as quickly as possible, and get all the help and support I thought that we would need. I don’t know how I got there.

“As I arrived at the house, it was full of people, full of police. And in my state of shock, I found myself getting angry that there was so many people around, angry that the police were there and didn’t do anything to stop it. I was so in shock that I sort of found myself shouting at the police. My sister was on the couch, completely and utterly lost to the world.

“It was possibly the worst moment, and then to have to go and see my nephew, it was the worst sight.”

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Hazard says he has “so much admiration” for his sister, Michelle, because through the “pain, grief, heartache and devastation” she came up with the idea to set up a charity so that other people never have to live through what she has lived through.

Michelle had gone for a walk at night to clear her mind amid the grief, but she was afraid of the dark. Somehow in the pitch black she found her way to a bench, and in that moment all she could think about was Jay.

She decided that night that the bench needed a light to help people feel safe and draw people to it, and on it would be telephone numbers to charities and specialised groups which offer help in times of crisis. From that, Legend on the Bench was born.

It creates suicide prevention benches with phone numbers and QR codes to vital mental health support for people struggling. The hope is to have a bench in every park in the UK to spread hope.

New research from Tottenham Hotspur finds that more than half (58%) of people struggling with their mental health would be reluctant to ask for support.

Hazard says that he would encourage anyone who is struggling to talk. “Listening is equally as important,” he adds. “Just as it’s important for people in dark places to talk, we need people to listen.”

Tottenham and Samaritans have released a film which shows the power of picking up the phone to ask for help, featuring a young male football fan battling with his mental health and attempting to suppress his feelings. It also includes manager Thomas Frank, coach Martin Ho, and first-team players. This film will be shown on match days at the stadium.

Spurs are set to host Liverpool on Saturday (20 December) and fans will be invited to share the message ‘to talk is to do’ – because talking saves lives.

A white phone box which appears in the film, representing the fan putting off calling Samaritans, will be available for photos on the day of the match and helpline cards will be handed out to local supporters.

Sonya Trivedy, executive director of external engagement at Samaritans, says: “Sharing how you feel when you’re in crisis can seem scary, but that first conversation is the most important one. Last year, Samaritans answered more than a quarter of a million calls for help over the festive period and our volunteers are ready to take your call 24/7 if you’re struggling this winter, even on Christmas Day, so you don’t have to face things alone.

“If just one Spurs fan goes on to call us after seeing this video, it could help save a life.”

This latest campaign builds on Tottenham’s previous work around suicide prevention, including the launch of a home match day support service this season, delivered by Mind in Haringey, which has seen more than 100 contacts to date and has already made life-saving interventions.

Hazard says he wasn’t as aware of mental health when he was a football player or a coach as he is now. He never particularly struggled with his own mental health.

“When I was young and playing football, I loved every second of it. I thought you had to accept, being a footballer, that someone’s going to criticise you, and someone is paying a lot of money to watch you play. But now that I have much more knowledge, I’m much more careful with what I say. If I was coaching now, I would be able to handle conversations with the boys in a way that protected their mental health.”

It is “incredibly tough” to become a footballer as it is, Hazard says. And with the advent of social media and the levels of fame footballers often see today, that can take its toll on a person’s mental health.

“Social media has incredibly wonderful points. For instance, something like this can be spread on social media and spread around the world very quickly. But it has some incredibly bad points. If you get on the wrong side of the line, you’re gonna suffer lot of criticism, unfair criticism and uncaring criticism that can affect your wellbeing. Footballers have to endure a lot more scrutiny than I ever did.”

‘Together Against Suicide’ was created by the Premier League alongside broadcaster Roman Kemp and Spurs CEO Vinai Venkatesham and sees clubs across the league offering matchday support to fans, helping raise awareness of information available and on-site assistance to those who need it most. It is delivered by Samaritans.

Hazard says it is “incredibly powerful” when football clubs like Spurs champion causes like this, and it is particularly “heartwarming” that it is the club which he has been part of since he was 11 years old. “To see my club playing such a vital part in something so special to me and important to me and my family and leading the way is amazing,” he says.

Hazard adds: “The most important gift that any of us are ever given is life. So it’s the responsibility of everyone, to get involved, to save lives, to be there when people need support and need advice. I’m not saying that you’re going to give the correct advice, but we give from the heart, and sometimes the heart and words are enough.”

Samaritans volunteers are available round-the-clock to listen and support people. They won’t judge or tell you what to do. Anyone in crisis can contact Samaritans, for free, any time from any phone on 116 123, even a mobile without credit. This number won’t show up on your phone bill. Or you can visit www.samaritans.org.

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