Football365

Tottenham boss Ange Postecoglou has explained his gesture to Spurs fans during their 1-0 loss to Chelsea in a prickly interview with Sky Sports.

Enzo Fernandez scored the only goal of the game on 50 minutes as the north Londoners remained in 14th place in the Premier League table.

Tottenham have been in awful form this season with Postecoglou’s side winning just ten of their 30 Premier League matches so far.

After Pape Matar Sarr’s long-range strike got Spurs back on level terms, which was eventually ruled out by a lengthy VAR check, Postecoglou appeared to cup his ear towards the away end.

Postecoglou was booed by the away section for bringing on Sarr in place of Lucas Bergvall and his reaction to the disallowed goal seemed in direct response to that.

When asked about his gesture by Sky Sports journalist Patrick Davison, Postecoglou said: “Yeah, I wanted them to be happy, mate. We’d just scored a cracking goal. So I wanted them to cheer – because they haven’t had a lot to cheer about.”

When asked whether his gesture was in reaction to his substitutions being booed, Postecoglou replied: “It’s not the first time my substitutions have been booed. If you followed my tenure, it’s not the first time. They’re allowed to boo. But I wanted them to cheer – because I thought it was a cracking goal.”

But Davison kept pressing, he said; “You said in the week – in your interview with Mark Schwarzer – that you felt you’d lost a portion of the fans. Is that what we saw tonight?”

Postecoglou hit back: “I get it, Pat. You’re trying really hard. That’s fine. You’ve already decided what the outcome is.”

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The Tottenham boss has never hidden his disdain for VAR and Postecoglou once again highlighted his frustrations with the technology.

“It’s killing the game, mate. It’s not the same game it used to be. We all sat on our couches last night and watched TV – I guarantee you, if [Thursday’s VAR] Jarred Gillett was the VAR last night, we’d have got a different outcome.”

Postecoglou was referring to the Merseyside Derby, still fuming he continued: “You just don’t know what you’re going to get. We waited for six minutes for something that apparently the VAR thought was clear and obvious. It’s madness, mate.”

When asked whether Sarr’s disallowed goal was the wrong call by Davison, Postecoglou said: “Look, Pat, you can try and force me into a corner.”

Davison: “I’m not trying to force you into anything.”

Postecoglou replied: “Did you think last night was clear and obvious? How many minutes did it take this referee to figure out whether it was clear and obvious? In your basic knowledge of human vocabulary – ‘clear and obvious’ – what does that suggest to you?”

Davison admitted: “No, it’s maybe not clear and obvious. I do think it’s a foul [by Sarr], if I’m honest.”

Postecoglou finished: “OK. Right. Well, there you go. So the referee didn’t see it. He then needs to see it for six minutes, but you get the right outcome so you’re happy – and that’s why the game’s going the way it is. And I guess people like you will continue to be happy sitting on your couches waiting for six minutes for clear and obvious stuff. That’s fine. I don’t agree with that, but that’s fine.”

Chelsea’s Moises Caicedo was described as a “diamond” by former Tottenham Hotspur boss Tim Sherwood.

The west London club defeated their city rivals 1-0 to boost their chances of staying in the top four as the season comes to a close.

Enzo Fernandez scored the only goal of the game, but it was his Chelsea midfield partner, Caicedo, that Sherwood picked out for praise.

“Caicedo is a diamond of a player,” Sherwood told Premier League Productions.

He breaks up so many attacks, he sits in that midfield, for [Levi] Colwill and [Trevoh] Chalobah tonight he must’ve been a dream.

“He was just in there and giving it to players who can play in front of him, the likes of Enzo, Cole Palmer, [Pedro] Neto, always threatens in behind even though it wasn’t his best game, they’ve got Nicolas Jackson back.

“They need to finish in the top five otherwise it’s not a very good season for them.”

Chelsea are one point ahead of Manchester City with eight games to go in the Premier League season and manager Enzo Maresca said at this stage of the campaign, every win is important.

“It’s very important. First of all, because of the performance. We know how important it is in this moment to win games, but since we start, we try to win games in the way we want, and I think tonight the performance was very good.

“I said yesterday in the press conference, the last four games at home was Leicester, Southampton, West Ham and Wolves. Four teams that they sit back and wait for us. Tonight, Tottenham, it’s a different kind of game, so for us in some way it’s better.”

Glenn Hoddle, meanwhile, said Chelsea were not at their best and would have been punished by a better team.

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“They didn”t play free-flowing, quick football where it was one, two touch through the pitch quickly, create, get corners, get pressure, it wasn”t that sort of performance from Chelsea,” Hoddle said.

“I think the manager said it right, they did enough to win, they deserved to win, they did just enough to win tonight against Tottenham who were playing a little bit within.

“If they”d have played against Liverpool tonight, or Man City, or Forest, they might have had some trouble, they really might.”

Ange Postecoglou looks too far gone with the Europa League saving grace unlikely after Spurs’ no-show vs Chelsea, who should pay to send Jadon Sancho back to Manchester United…

Chelsea’s toothless performance against Arsenal made us question whether they even wanted to win after Enzo Maresca’s side willfully allowed their London rivals to coast to the easiest of victories.

This weak showing left Chelsea with the same points tally as Manchester United since their Premier League title challenge started to evaporate in mid-December.

In this time, Spurs have been even worse as Championship-bound Southampton, Leicester City and Ipswich Town are the only Premier League teams with fewer points in 2025 than Postecoglou’s side.

Tottenham’s injury crisis is a mitigating factor, but even their patched-up squad has massively underperformed and not turned up in far too many games this season.

Their injury issues have eased with all of their eggs in the Europa League basket as Cristian Romero and Micky van de Ven started together against Chelsea.

This is the first time they have each started since the reverse fixture against Chelsea in December, in which they were forced off after being rushed back from injury.

History did not repeat itself on Thursday night, but the Spurs duo had a rough evening against a returning Nicolas Jackson, who gave Chelsea the focal point that was sorely lacking vs Arsenal and in previous pre-international break fixtures.

Jackson’s lively return to action contributed to an improved performance from Chelsea, who showed intent from the opening whistle and almost took the lead within a minute as Van de Ven touched the ball onto the post.

The striker’s development has eased Chelsea’s need to sign a top-tier striker, but issues remain in wide areas, with Jadon Sancho and Pedro Neto continuing to infuriate.

Sancho had the best chance of the opening of the first half; his effort was superbly tipped over the bar by an overwise erratic Guglielmo Vicario.

However, it was another disappointing game for Sancho as he mostly insisted on dribbling into a tackle or going for a pass when in a shooting opportunity, which royally wound up the home crowd.

Sancho’s bright start to this campaign has been undermined by a dramatic decline; months of ineffectiveness have sapped his confidence to the point where the £5m penalty charge to send him back to Man Utd looks a bargain.

READ: Premier League prize money calculated after latest TV games announcement

Cole Palmer has also had his confidence knocked as Chelsea’s nonchalant star man has proven he’s human, but normality was restored against Tottenham as he produced a big moment.

Chelsea dominated the first half as the visitors failed to register a shot on target in a tepid performance, but the host’s lack of a clinical edge – even against such a poor opponent – threatened to put Maresca and his side under more pressure via a glaring missed opportunity to capitalise on a visit from Dr Tottenham.

Thankfully for Maresca, Palmer sparred his blushes. His pinpoint cross was headed home from close range by Enzo Fernandez. He and Moises Caicedo were Chelsea’s two best players on the night; the latter is unfortunate not to feature in our team of the season so far.

This derby did not come close to matching the seven-goal thriller in December, but Thursday’s match was not without incident as Caicedo (correctly for offside in the build-up) and Pape Sarr (correctly for a foul) had goals chalked off by VAR, which a touchy and straw-clutching Postecoglou focused on post-match after his latest clashes with Spurs supporters provided further evidence that they have grown tired of one another.

Even with the World Cup winner and Van de Ven finally back together, Spurs were wide open in defence and would have been on the end of a one-sided hammering against a Premier League foe in a more rampant mood.

Pre-match, Jamie Redknapp said this season would be “unbelievable” for Spurs if they win the Europa League, but this feels like a big ask after Postecoglou’s underdelivering team didn’t do nearly enough to trouble an off-peak Chelsea and will come unstuck against the Bundesliga’s third-placed side, Eintracht Frankfurt, if there’s not a spark improvement to save the Aussie’s job, which is slipping away from him.

As for Chelsea, there were positives with the promising return of Jackson, Palmer getting the monkey off his back with his first goal involvement since February, Fernandez’s all-action performance and Caicedo establishing himself as “one of the best defensive midfielders in the world”.

The Blues are a far cry from the side they were at the start of this season, but – much like for Liverpool in Wednesday’s Merseyside derby – the victory was the most important thing tonight to restore order.

As Redknapp said pre-match, a win tonight could be the “catalyst” for an upturn in form during the run-in to seal Champions League qualification, which they need to grasp because this version of Chelsea will still be picked off against superior opposition to Spurs.

Chelsea and Tottenham will renew rivalries when they meet in a Premier League fixture at Stamford Bridge on Thursday.

Ange Postecoglou’s record against Chelsea doesn’t make for pretty reading. The Aussie has lost all three meetings with the Blues, conceding 10 goals in the process.

We asked Big Ange how he plans to turn that record around, but he just got upset and told us that he always thought it would take three years to have success in the Premier League.

Barring an incredible end-of-season run, Thursday’s trip to the Bridge is nothing more than an opportunity to be spiteful and p*ss on Chelsea’s chips.

Ange is now second favourite in the sack race but that would seem particularly harsh to us, as 85% of Spurs’ net spend in the transfer window went on players 21 and under.

The same approach has worked wonders for a Chelsea side on the verge of Champions League football, though spending the best part of £600,000,000 on 25 players has left them surprisingly better equipped to deal with injuries than Spurs.

Still, we’re here to make a case for the visitors claiming a result on Thursday.

Chelsea vs Tottenham prediction:

Injuries have derailed Tottenham’s chances of making a real fist of this season, yet they were able to field almost their strongest side when surrendering a 2-0 lead to lose to Chelsea in the reverse fixture.

Neither side is in great form coming into this fixture, with the Blues having won two of five in the league. Those wins came against, let’s be honest, already relegated teams in Southampton and Leicester City.

Spurs haven’t fared much better, winless in three before the international break and losing eight of 14 on their travels this season.

Despite that, something is telling us to zig when we should zag. Ange and his team had the break to get healthy and refocus, intending to salvage some pride and finish near the top half at least.

Keep in mind Spurs have produced emphatic wins away to Man United, Man City and Brentford this season, all at a time when the chips were down.

In addition to backing the visitors to spring a surprise, we’re predicting they’ll pile the pressure on the Chelsea goal at some point and make Robert Sanchez earn his crust.

Chelsea team news

Chelsea look set to welcome several key players back to the fold in the coming week, though it remains to be seen if any of them will be fit to start on Thursday.

Wesley Fofana has been a standout performer in defence for the Blues, and so could partner Levi Colwill as part of a back four.

Reece James, Marc Cucurella, Enzo Fernandez and Moises Caicedo came through the international break unscathed.

Christopher Nkunku may be asked to continue playing on the left if Pedro Neto is deployed in attack, which all depends on the fitness of the returning Nicolas Jackson.

Noni Madueke is also an option in the wide areas.

Chelsea expected line-up

Sanchez – James, Fofana, Colwill, Cucurella – Fernandez, Caicedo – Sancho, Palmer, Nkunku – Neto

Tottenham team news

Ange should be able to call upon the trio of Vicario, Christian Romero and Micky van de Ven on a regular basis going forward, which is huge for Spurs’ end-of-season prospects.

They’ll be flanked by the dependable Pedro Porro on the right and surprise package Djed Spence, who not so long ago was deemed surplus to requirements and sent on an ill-fated loan spell to Championship Leeds, on the left.

Archie Gray enjoyed a start in a more familiar role in midfield last time out, but we expect him to make way with Lucas Bergvall and James Maddison as options.

Wilson Odobert could be deployed on the left but that’ll depend on the availability of Dejan Kulusevski, with his status unknown at the time of writing.

If Kulu is indeed fit, you’d expect him to join Dominic Solanke and Son Heung-Min in the attack.

Tottenham expected line-up

Vicario – Porro, Romero, Van de Ven, Spence – Bergvall, Bentancur, Maddison – Odobert, Solanke, Heung-Min

Chelsea vs Tottenham: How to watch and listen

You can watch Chelsea vs Tottenham live on Sky Sports Ultra HDR, Sky Sports Main Event and Sky Sports Premier League on Thursday, April 3. There’s also live commentary on BBC Radio 5 Live Sport.

Chelsea vs Tottenham stats:

Chelsea’s three-match win streak has compounded their dominance in this fixture, in which they’ve won 23 and drawn 12 of 43 meetings.

Chelsea came from 2-0 down inside 11 minutes to score four unanswered goals and win the reverse fixture 4-3.

Chelsea’s last three matches have finished 1-0, the first time they’ve played out the same scoreline in three consecutive games since facing Leicester, Southampton and West Ham in March of 2022.

The last time they featured in a trio if 1-0 wins was when they beat West Brom, Sunderland and Crystal Palace in 2016.

Chelsea’s home games are averaging 3.03xG per game this season, which is identical to the 3.03xG Spurs are averaging in away games.

Tottenham have won more matches on their travels than at home this season, taking maximum points in 36% of away trips compared to 33% of home dates.

Chelsea vs Tottenham referee stats:

Craig Pawson, who was demoted by UEFA last summer and controversially ruled out a late Chelsea goal at this stage of the season last year, will take charge of Thursday’s fixture.

He was also at the centre of VAR controversy this season as Everton fans fumed at his decision not to award the Toffees a penalty against Newcastle in October.

Thursday’s assignment will be his 18th Premier League fixture of a campaign which has also seen him officiate games in the Champions League, League Cup, Europa League and Nations League.

It will be the first time he’s refereed Chelsea this season, but he did oversee Spurs’ 4-1 win at home to Aston Villa recently.

Pawson is averaging 4.12 yellow cards per game, 0.18 red cards and has awarded five penalties in 22 contests.

According to reports, Manchester United are ‘preparing an offer’ to sign Crystal Palace star Eberechi Eze amid interest from Tottenham Hotspur.

The Red Devils are already linked with several potential targets ahead of this summer’s transfer window with a significant squad overhaul necessary.

United have spent most of the 2024/25 campaign in the bottom half of the Premier League table and need to win the Europa League to qualify for Europe ahead of next season.

Man Utd have struggled to adapt to Ruben Amorim‘s preferred style and formation, so INEOS will be hoping that a summer rebuild could make their squad more aligned with the head coach’s methods.

Upgrades are required in forward areas as Man Utd have been toothless in attack this season. Their priority will be to sign a new striker, but they also need to invest in a No.10 or two.

READ: Rashford ‘could play for Manchester United again’ – if finger-pointing Ruben Amorim suddenly resigns

Eze has been sporadically linked with Man Utd over the past couple of years and his performance in Crystal Palace’s FA Cup quarter-final should tempt the Red Devils to make a summer move.

The England international sparkled for Palace last season, but his form dipped before he grabbed a goal and an assist in his side’s 3-0 win against Fulham.

A report from Spanish outlet Fichajes claims Eze has been ‘identified’ as Man Utd’s ‘new dream’ target and they are ‘preparing a 60 million euro [£50m] offer’.

This offer would not quite meet Crystal Palace’s asking price, and there are two ‘problems’ to overcome.

‘Manchester United has set its sights on Eberechi Eze as one of its priorities for summer reinforcements.

‘With a transfer market that promises to be intense, the English club’s directors have identified the Crystal Palace midfielder as a player with the right profile to bolster their squad.’

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‘However, securing his services will not be an easy task, as his club is not willing to let him leave for less than 60 million pounds, a figure that could complicate the operation.

‘United’s footballing management, led by Christopher Vivell and Jason Wilcox, is exploring various options for the summer transfer window, but interest in Eze is strong. His playmaking ability and attacking versatility fit with the coaching staff’s vision of strengthening the squad. Furthermore, Rubén Amorim sees him as a player with the talent necessary to be a starter and make a difference in the Premier League.

‘The problem for the Red Devils lies not only in the high cost of the deal, but also in the competition.

‘Tottenham is closely monitoring the player’s situation and could enter the bidding process, although they first need to resolve the continuity of Ange Postecoglou, who is under pressure after recent results.’

According to reports, Aston Villa are plotting a ‘tempting offer’ as they interested in signing Tottenham Hotspur centre-back Cristian Romero.

The World Cup winner established himself as one of the leading centre-backs in the Premier League following his move to Tottenham, but he has missed most of this season due to injury.

The 26-year-old has only made 14 Premier League starts this season after missing games with toe and hamstring issues, but he returned to action before the international break.

Romero‘s long-term future at Spurs appears to be in doubt, as he has been heavily linked with an exit in recent weeks.

Earlier this month, a report from GiveMeSport claimed Spurs are ‘poised to give Romero an ultimatum’ ahead of the summer.

‘Influential figures behind the scenes are poised to give Romero an ultimatum as he will be pushed to sign a new Tottenham contract or leave during the summer, according to GMS sources.’

READ: Ten reasons why this Premier League season has not been entirely sh*t

‘The north Londoners are aware that La Liga title-chasers Real Madrid could be prepared to make a substantial offer if he is put on the market.

‘Although GMS sources have been informed that Tottenham have refused to rule out the possibility of sanctioning Romero’s departure ahead of next term, their preference is to keep him and offer a giant contract which would see him leap to the top of the wage bill.’

Despite lingering interest from Real Madrid, a new report from Football Transfers claims Aston Villa are ‘circling’ with Romero ‘wanting an exit’.

The report suggests Spurs are close to admitting defeat with Romero as they are ‘preparing for his exit’.

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The report explains:

‘The 27-year-old Argentine is looking for a new challenge and the Birmingham club are ready to offer him a tempting opportunity.

‘We are told that Spurs are open to selling Romero but want around £55 million (€66m) for him. Sources with knowledge of the situation say Tottenham are preparing for his exit and are already searching for a replacement at centre-back.

‘Aston Villa are willing to offer Romero a five-year contract, which is exactly the kind of long-term deal he wants at this stage of his career. However, they aren’t the only club interested.

‘Antonio Conte remains a big fan of the defender after his time at Tottenham and he is keen on reuniting with him at Napoli. Bayern Munich are also known admirers of the 2022 World Cup winner.’

Ange Postecoglou is reportedly unlikely to keep his Tottenham job without European success, as it’s stated ‘Europa League or bust’ is the message at the club now.

Postecoglou’s Spurs side are far worse off this season than they were last. In his first season at the helm, the Australian boss engineered a fifth-placed finish, just two points off the top four.

This season, though, Tottenham are in 14th, and 10 points separate them from 10th-placed Bournemouth. Pressure is mounting on Postecoglou, with reports suggesting he’s soon to be shown the door.

And while it might not be before the end of the season, the latter stage will decide his fate.

Indeed, Football Insider reports Postecoglou is ‘not likely to cling onto the dugout’ if he doesn’t deliver European success. Tottenham face Eintracht Frankfurt in the quarter-finals of the Europa League.

And it’s said the message at the club is now simply ‘Europa League or bust’. Silverware is the only way of salvaging the season, and that’s the only trophy still available to Postecoglou’s men.

Also still in the competition are big names such as Lazio, Manchester United and Lyon. And though league for might be immaterial, the report states defeat in the upcoming London derby against Chelsea could ‘heap pressure’ on Postecoglou.

Spurs lost 4-3 to the Blues in a thriller earlier in the season, giving away two penalties in the game, both of which were converted by Cole Palmer.

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In their last three Premier League games, Tottenham have lost to Manchester City, drawn with Bournemouth, and then lost to Fulham. That run of poor results is not one which they will want to see continue.

However, Chelsea are 10 places above them in the Premier League, so it might be an uphill battle not to be beaten by their London rivals.

Tottenham are also believed to be looking overseas for potential replacements, with a number of Premier League bosses already on the radar.

Tottenham manager Ange Postecoglou could reportedly be replaced by an overseas manager next season after his struggles this year.

The Spurs’ boss has endured a torrid season with injuries and poor performances, and his side sits 14th in the Premier League with a shocking 15 defeats. They do remain in the Europa League but face a tricky run to the final in what is a very competitive final eight.

Throughout the season, there have been many calls for the club to part ways with the stubborn yet expressive manager who has brought an incredible style of attacking play to the club. This season has seen them create the fifth-highest expected goals figure in the league but concede the fourth-worst expected goals against.

Of course, he has fought against a never-ending list of injuries and has been forced to play youngster Archie Gray, a traditional midfielder, at centre-back with back-up choice Ben Davies or Radu Dragusin. The frustrations have been felt by their players with Cristian Romero reportedly eyeing a move this summer as a result.

In terms of Postecoglou’s future, he has been defiant all season long, but there have been heavy links of a trio of managers that could take over his role: Bournemouth’s Andoni Iraola, Fulham boss Marco Silva and Brentford manager Thomas Frank.

However, a new report has claimed that the club are scouring the overseas market. Football Insider have revealed that sources have told them this and that they are looking to cast a wide net to replace the Australian manager.

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Difficulties in recruiting Iraola, Frank

With Iraola fast becoming one of the most in-demand coaches after his spell with Bournemouth, he would likely aim for a higher benchmark than Spurs. Especially given that Bournemouth could achieve European football.

There have been some links with Real Madrid as well, and he is held in an extremely high regard. With Frank, he has become part of the furniture at Brentford, and perhaps only the top teams could be able to tempt him away from a place that has become his home.

Marco Silva could potentially be an easier option to prise away given that he isn’t as adored at Fulham as much as the Iraola and Frank are at their respective clubs and he has shown a willingness to change roles across his career.

Other managers from outside of the Premier League could include the former Borussia Dortmund boss Edin Terzic, former Manchester United boss Erik Ten Hag, the former Juventus boss Massimiliano Allegri and ex-Brighton man Roberto De Zerbi.

We were very, very rude about this Premier League season the other week. We were angry and we lashed out and we, well, we called it the worst Premier League season ever.

That was very mean of us and the fact it is 100% true and correct and accurate only slightly eases how guilty we feel about it. Poor 2024/25 Premier League season, just trying to go quietly about its business and we’re here calling it names. What an absolute prick.

So to try and redress the balance, we’ve thought really, really hard and just about managed to come up with 10 actual good things about this season.

The Novelty Value

Can’t go around complaining, as we are all sometimes guilty of doing, that the Premier League is a big dull closed shop where the same teams fight among themselves for the same rewards while everyone else has to live off scraps season after season and then also have a big tantrum when the top of the league looks funny with all weird and wrong teams in it.

Well we can – and did – do that, but you can’t do it without being an insufferable little tagnut. So let us acknowledge that there is undeniably a certain intoxicating quality to a league table where Nottingham Forest enjoy a six-point lead over Man City at this late stage, where Brighton, Fulham, Bournemouth and Brentford represent more plausible European qualifiers than Manchester United or Spurs and the relegation spots are a fascinating, unpredictable fight betw… oh. Well at least the top of the table is interesting. Don’t look at the bottom bit.

Big Final Run-in: Liverpool transfer prep, Arsenal, Nottingham Forest, Maresca, Foden

Bad Barclays Is Still Barclays

As ever, timing remains one of our very greatest strengths. Whinging like a bloody great baby about an unexciting Premier League season just before a yawning two-week abyss of an international break featuring the worst possible England action – two comfortable, routine, regulation wins that did absolutely nothing to get the blood up – was followed up by a weekend given over entirely to the FA Cup quarter-finals.

Now we’ve nothing against FA Cup quarter-finals, but four matches does not a top-flight football weekend make. Yes, yes, the FA Cup has ‘got its magic back’ very good, that’s lovely. Now give us Man United v Arsenal and four days of increasingly unhinged and bad-tempered fallout please.

The Salah Debate

There’s always been something about Mo Salah that has agitated people. We genuinely don’t know what it is and aren’t trying to be flippant or snarky about it, even though those are our default settings. It seems to us that when people talk about Salah in terms of Premier League greatness there’s always an ‘obviously’ yet then also a ‘but’ in there that is really hard to justify for a player who has such astonishing numbers and so clearly passes the eye test.

And now he’s put together just about the perfect season to heighten everything about this particular discourse. On the one hand, he is on course for a season of statistical greatnesss unmatched in Premier League history, winning both Golden Boot and Playmaker awards by huge margins (Current Salah PL goal contributions this season: 44; next best: 24) to deliver his team the league title by another huge margin. And his team is not one that has, in the Premier League era, made a habit of winning league titles.

Yet he has also gone missing entirely when his team needed him most in the Champions League knockouts and Carabao final.

And thus it remains – but somehow, ridiculously, even more so – ‘Salah? Great player, obviously, but…’

Is he really one of only two Premier League players with ‘star quality’?

Barclays: The Next Generation

One definite boon from so many of the big clubs being so many assorted flavours of sh*t for such vast swathes of the season has been the chance to see some new, young and exciting players take the chance to impress.

Even at the two biggest current clown-car operations in the league at Manchester United and Tottenham, the dark black clouds have had silver linings thanks to your Amad Diallos, your Archie Grays and your Lucas Bergvalls.

Arsenal also have not one but two young pups already seemingly destined for greatness. Especially Ethan Nwaneri, but especially Myles Lewis-Skelly, who, as well being obviously a good player, has even greater potential as an arch sh*thouse. And that really is something to get excited about because housery is one of those things – like being a centre-back or goalkeeper – that is notoriously hard for a player so young to master.

Proper Centre-Forwards

Dying out, weren’t they? Your Proper Centre-Forwards? With 4-4-2 considered embarrassingly primitive there was less and less call for Classic No. 9s in the modern Barclays.

But this year has produced a retort of sorts that extends far beyond the absurd Goalbot stylings of everyone’s favourite Leeds-born Norwegian.

Thirteen players are in double figures for Premier League goals this season – which is a quite pitiful number really, but we are struggling to find ways to make this look like a good season okay so cut us some slack – and nine of those 13 are unquestionably Proper Centre-Forwards. Forget about Salah and his absurd season for a minute, and the only other non-centre-forward interlopers in the double-digits gang are Bryan Mbeumo, Cole Palmer and Justin Kluivert. And both Palmer and Kluivert are at worst ‘second-striker’ types.

Smashing The Crystal Ceiling

Crystal Palace’s final points tally for each season since returning to the Premier League for the 2013/14 campaign: 45, 48, 42, 41, 44, 49, 43, 44, 48, 45, 49. Eleven straight seasons of 40-something totals. An almost sarcastic average total of 45.27 per season.

And now, with 39 points from 28 games, they stand on the brink of the unthinkable. Just 11 points from 10 games – a piece of p*ss on current form – and they will shatter the 50-point barrier for the first time.

And not just for the first time since getting back into the Premier League just over a decade ago, but for the first time in their Premier League history. Palace’s grim obsession with 40-something totals extends to contriving to get relegated with 49 and then 45 points during the early 22-team years of the competition.

The first of those remains a now surely unbreakable Premier League record for the highest points total for any relegated team, while the second singles Palace out as the only Premier League team to be relegated from fourth bottom as English football’s biggest beast assumed its final 20-team form.

Many people will say winning a first FA Cup is Palace’s main priority for the remaining weeks of this season. But many people are wrong.

Nottingham Forest And Yer Da

Been proved right, hasn’t he? Vindication at last for all those years he stubbornly kept Forest on the laminated list he keeps in his wallet of the 20 proper and correct Premier League teams despite them having only been in what he still calls the Premiership for five of its first 30 seasons – and relegated in three of those five.

He’s had the last laugh, hasn’t he? Classic Yer Da. Know your place, son, and respect your elders. Now if Sheffield Wednesday can just come good he really will be unbearable.

Tottenham Hotspur Or Spurs

The first law of football remains that whatever happens anywhere to anyone, the joke must always be on Spurs. But that has been taken to bold new heights this season.

We did, of course, include Spurs’ (and Man United’s) startling sh*tness as one of the sh*t things about this sh*t season due to its undeniable impact on the overall quality of the division, but there’s no point pretending it isn’t also very funny.

Newcastle ending their trophy drought has robbed Spurs of another canary down that particular mine, with every chance for Villa, Forest or Palace to follow suit in the FA Cup. But Spurs have very much boasted main character energy in their punchline status this season, all the way down (up?) to asking everyone to stop calling them ‘Tottenham’ when they should be prostrate in gratitude to anyone who doesn’t call them something far, far ruder at this time.

They are spectacularly, epically, heroically bad and, unless you have the misfortune to actually support them, an absolute guarantee of entertainment. They are the neutral’s friend this season to an almost absurd degree, with their only two apparent settings being ‘hilarious defeat’ and ‘goal-laden victory’.

Schadenfreude In General

And Spurs aren’t even the only ones, are they? Laughing at Man United hits different for those of a certain age. Those who had their childhoods ruined by Fergie and his relentless, joy-crushing, trophy-hogging teams.

They’ve been bad for a while now but, like Spurs, have taken it to astonishing heights never seen before from a single one, never mind a ludicrous pair, of the big boys in the Big Six era.

It’s even managed to almost entirely overshadow Man City going from title certainties to Champions League scramblers and whatever it is that Chelsea are currently up to.

Moyesiah

Sometimes it’s nice just to see something nice. Sometimes that’s enough. There’s revisionism aplenty around David Moyes’ West Ham reign now, but the facts remain a lot of it was grimly unwatchable for no particularly tangible reward in the results column. Not in the Premier League anyway. It wasn’t working for anyone, and it was right that it ended.

But that didn’t mean Moyes didn’t have something to offer someone, and his return to Everton – a club he knows and instinctively understands – has been lovely. He’s steered them well away from any relegation unpleasantness, allowed fans who have been through more than enough stress in recent seasons the treat of being able to just relax and enjoy the Goodison Park farewell, and there is no other plausible Everton manager more deserving of leading them out next season at their spanking new home.

There, surely that’s enough niceness now.

Tottenham reportedly have Sporting CP defender Ousmane Diomande ‘very high’ on their shortlist for the summer, while the defender is said to be ‘set to leave’ his current club for £17million lower than his release clause.

Spurs’ best centre-back pairing of Micky van de Ven and Cristian Romero is a good one. The pair have played 39 times together for the north London outfit, winning 1.77 points per game.

However, this season, they have played alongside each other just 11 times, owing to injuries. The pairing could be split up for good, too, with a recent report starting Romero is ‘willing to do everything’ to leave in the summer.

Atletico Madrid are said to be chasing him, and Tottenham could receive a big fee from the transfer.

They will want to replace Romero with a top-quality defender, and reportedly have Sporting’s Diomande in their sights. Indeed, TBRFootball reports the centre-back is ‘set to leave’ his current club this summer, and Tottenham have been watching him all season.

Despite manager Ruben Amorim’s exit in November, Sporting have maintained form and are still top of Liga Portugal, with 21-year-old Diomande playing almost every game.

While ‘several Premier League clubs’ are said to like the centre-back, Tottenham are reportedly ‘very much in the conversation’ for him. They have closely followed him this season and could make a move for him in the summer.

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Diomande has a £67million release clause, though as per the report, it’s believed his price could be dropped down to £50million.

That is less than it’s suggested Tottenham will demand for Romero, so they could certainly have a chance of landing the Sporting man if they are to lose their own centre-back.

Manchester United have previously been linked with Diomande, given his former boss Amorim coaches the Red Devils, while their rivals Manchester City are mentioned, as are Chelsea, Liverpool and Newcastle.

But Spurs are said to be in the mix, so could see their defence improve from the struggles of this season, when they have shipped 43 Premier League goals in 29 games so far.